Cell Phone's & Relationships

I was in a relationship for four years, I knew everything that he was doing. We would text when we both woke up. Facetime every night before we went to bed, and course, snap chat throughout the day every day. So, when we were asked to come up with an idea for a blog post, I knew that I wanted to look into the affects that this has on a relationship. Am I the only one who experienced, and or experiences these day to day activities. It turns out I wasn’t alone. According to the New York Times that recently came out with an article regarding this topic, they stated “In a recent survey, more than half of adolescent girls and boys had dated someone who tried to monitor or control them by texting so frequently that it made the recipient uncomfortable, expecting immediate responses, asking for their passwords, or tracking their location or social activity.” https://www.nytimes.com/2017/09/21/well/family/the-love-lives-of-digital-natives.htmlI constantly hear my friends talk about checking their significant others location on snap maps, or having their location be shared with them at all times. For many of us something like this is normal. However, it creates extremely unhealthy relationships. 

Image by Ed Yourdon / Flickr

So many fights are started through the use of technology. For example, if one person in the relationship, let’s say a boy and girl relationship starts to like other girl’s photos on social media, a fight will break out. This creates a ton of insecurities. The New York Times article states “If someone wants to know what you are doing all the time, that can feel like a really close relationship. But that healthy romances are grounded in trust and support, not spying or intimidation.” 

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/09/21/well/family/the-love-lives-of-digital-natives.html Long distance relationships most likely work more now than they did a couple years ago, due to the fact that we are in constant contact with one another. However, I believe in the saying that everything happens for a reason. So, if two people are separated miles and miles away, are you meant to be together in that moment? Teenagers now in days cannot let things in life happen, they have total control in their relationships. “Leora Trub, PhD — an assistant professor of psychology at the Pace University Dyson College of Arts and Sciences — tells Bustle, “texting is easy you can do it while you’re doing other things, you’re expected to respond immediately, you’re not expected to use it mindfully and thoughtfully.” https://www.bustle.com/p/how-texting-affects-your-relationship-according-to-science-10063894Another thing to note is that, love is easier to express over text. However, it is not as meaningful when it is done through text. It makes it a lot harder to express yourself when you are face to face with someone, when you are so used to doing it over a phone. So therefore, the technology is creating a decline in communication skills between two young couples. Communication is the key to a healthy working relationship.

 I think that it is an important thing to notice that technology is really affecting the relationships that young adults are trying to form. With a screen constantly blocking them, there leaves little room for real human contact. There is very little trust, and a lot of anxiety that is being created for no reason. 

Homepage Image via Seth Anderson / Flickr

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